I will now google image search said elf to see if my brain is just making it up...
hahaha, yup. That's him. He has these adorable round frameless glasses that are too big for him too. A new character is born.
Still though- screw Harry Potter.
Showing posts with label cast of characters. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cast of characters. Show all posts
house elf sensei
Tags:
cast of characters
Though I find the Harry Potter franchise and all of its incarnations thoroughly objectionable, there's this one teacher who, for lack of a better comparison, or perhaps due to my supplantment in this vacuum from my own culture for the last 8 months, looks exactly like the house elves from the Harry Potter movies.
I will now google image search said elf to see if my brain is just making it up...
hahaha, yup. That's him. He has these adorable round frameless glasses that are too big for him too. A new character is born.
Still though- screw Harry Potter.
I will now google image search said elf to see if my brain is just making it up...
hahaha, yup. That's him. He has these adorable round frameless glasses that are too big for him too. A new character is born.
Still though- screw Harry Potter.
Cast of Characters
Tags:
cast of characters,
religion
So you've heard of us?
Every couple months, I am visitted by door-to-door preachers: the Japanese Jehovah's Witnesses. I hear several cars pull across the gravel in the jutaku parking lot, doors slam, and low chattering permeates from outside the window. The first time this happened, my friend John, who has been here a bit longer than me, peaked through the curtain and said "Those people are up to no good. Do you know them?"
What happens next is very uniform: the doorbell rings, they say "oh! you're not Japanese!" they flip through a small paper book to the page with English, and say "read, this please!" with a nice, big smile. The page starts with something like "Hello! We are Jehova's Witnesses! Though we don't speak the same language, I wish to share my faith with you." I nod and say "Ah, I understand."
"So you've heard of us?"
"Yes, I've heard of you... I'm okay."
"You're okay?"
"Yes, I'm okay. Thank you!"
"O- Okay. ...Bye!"
"Byeeeeee"
Fast forward 8 weeks. Repeat.
Every couple months, I am visitted by door-to-door preachers: the Japanese Jehovah's Witnesses. I hear several cars pull across the gravel in the jutaku parking lot, doors slam, and low chattering permeates from outside the window. The first time this happened, my friend John, who has been here a bit longer than me, peaked through the curtain and said "Those people are up to no good. Do you know them?"
What happens next is very uniform: the doorbell rings, they say "oh! you're not Japanese!" they flip through a small paper book to the page with English, and say "read, this please!" with a nice, big smile. The page starts with something like "Hello! We are Jehova's Witnesses! Though we don't speak the same language, I wish to share my faith with you." I nod and say "Ah, I understand."
"So you've heard of us?"
"Yes, I've heard of you... I'm okay."
"You're okay?"
"Yes, I'm okay. Thank you!"
"O- Okay. ...Bye!"
"Byeeeeee"
Fast forward 8 weeks. Repeat.
Cast of Characters
Tags:
ATV dude,
cast of characters,
NBA
It's 8:22 and I can be seen hurrying to work, by car as of late, despite the very short distance to my school; it's 15 minutes by foot, 6 by bicycle and 2 by car.
Just about every day, at the same moment I pull up to the traffic light down the road, a middle-aged man can be seen rounding the corner in his ATV. He looks so smug and self-content in his characteristic goggles, which are reminiscent of basketball legends Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and Horace Grant. Without fail, as I approach the light at 8:22, he too turns that fateful corner and we exchange knowing glances as he tackles the all-terrain road and passes the local dry-cleaner's, gradually accelerating to the speed limit of about 25 mph.
I like to think that this daily excursion is part of his morning routine, perhaps taking place before he heads to work. I imagine that after a few laps around the block, he returns to his modest abode and removes his goggles, wiping adrenaline-filled beads of sweat from his brow. His wife, plain though loving, eagerly inquiring as to all the details of today's outting. He plays it off like it's no big deal, but both parties know better; he is truly a badass.
Hats off to you, ATV man; your thirst for adventure amidst the rice fields and love hotels has captured our spirits and our hearts. You will always have a place to call your own in my Amagi Cast of Characters.
Horace "The General" Grant
Just about every day, at the same moment I pull up to the traffic light down the road, a middle-aged man can be seen rounding the corner in his ATV. He looks so smug and self-content in his characteristic goggles, which are reminiscent of basketball legends Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and Horace Grant. Without fail, as I approach the light at 8:22, he too turns that fateful corner and we exchange knowing glances as he tackles the all-terrain road and passes the local dry-cleaner's, gradually accelerating to the speed limit of about 25 mph.
I like to think that this daily excursion is part of his morning routine, perhaps taking place before he heads to work. I imagine that after a few laps around the block, he returns to his modest abode and removes his goggles, wiping adrenaline-filled beads of sweat from his brow. His wife, plain though loving, eagerly inquiring as to all the details of today's outting. He plays it off like it's no big deal, but both parties know better; he is truly a badass.
Hats off to you, ATV man; your thirst for adventure amidst the rice fields and love hotels has captured our spirits and our hearts. You will always have a place to call your own in my Amagi Cast of Characters.
Horace "The General" Grantcast of characters
There's this one old man who lives in my town who sometimes visits my school to teach the art club. He's a relatively reknowned (at least locally) Hanga artist, that is, Japanese wood-cut printmaking. Even though i usually cannot attend his instructional sessions at my school (he comes on the same day as my Japanese class downtown) I go whenever possible and he seemed to take a liking to me almost immediately.
He likes to call me "Doctor Michael" because I told him was thinking about going to MD or PhD programs at some point in the future. Basically everyone in town knows him and his craft. To illustrate this point, I was once going to his house for a party, and the hand-drawn map he drew me indicated that his house was on the complete opposite side of town. So i was wandering around the entirely wrong neighborhood and asked a random shop keeper if they knew Sano Sensei's house. As far as i could tell they were like "THE Sano sensei?" and I was like yeah! and they proceeded to draw me a real map to his house. Yes, this is that kind of community.
On another occasion I was walking around with Sano sensei going into random stores and barber shops where he knows people. Basically everywhere we went had something hanging on the wall that he would point to and say "I made that." He also showed me architectural drafts he's done that have been built into actual homes in the city.
I went to a new Years Party he was hosting with some former students. They are great. They apparently get together frequently and their group name is "The Weasels" Which is a play on one of the member's names, i think, which i guess sounds like the Japanese word for weasel.
He's 84, and let me assure you, I can't understand a WORD of what he says. Actually I have gotten to the point where i can usually understand Japanese people, believe it or not, but old people simply speak a different language. It's hard to demonstrate without showing you an imitation in person. basically just try to imagine tipsy 60 year old dudes hanging out in dive bars in America. It's basically the equivalent of that. He even pronounces the most common words with complete different, old-fashioned sounds. So I talk to this guy, and I understand about 10% of what he says, but nevertheless he seems to LOVE me. And is always trying to explain something simple to me about Japan. I look confused but it's only because I have no idea what words he's using.
So yeah, Local hero. Cool grandfather character in my Japanese life.
He likes to call me "Doctor Michael" because I told him was thinking about going to MD or PhD programs at some point in the future. Basically everyone in town knows him and his craft. To illustrate this point, I was once going to his house for a party, and the hand-drawn map he drew me indicated that his house was on the complete opposite side of town. So i was wandering around the entirely wrong neighborhood and asked a random shop keeper if they knew Sano Sensei's house. As far as i could tell they were like "THE Sano sensei?" and I was like yeah! and they proceeded to draw me a real map to his house. Yes, this is that kind of community.
On another occasion I was walking around with Sano sensei going into random stores and barber shops where he knows people. Basically everywhere we went had something hanging on the wall that he would point to and say "I made that." He also showed me architectural drafts he's done that have been built into actual homes in the city.
I went to a new Years Party he was hosting with some former students. They are great. They apparently get together frequently and their group name is "The Weasels" Which is a play on one of the member's names, i think, which i guess sounds like the Japanese word for weasel.
He's 84, and let me assure you, I can't understand a WORD of what he says. Actually I have gotten to the point where i can usually understand Japanese people, believe it or not, but old people simply speak a different language. It's hard to demonstrate without showing you an imitation in person. basically just try to imagine tipsy 60 year old dudes hanging out in dive bars in America. It's basically the equivalent of that. He even pronounces the most common words with complete different, old-fashioned sounds. So I talk to this guy, and I understand about 10% of what he says, but nevertheless he seems to LOVE me. And is always trying to explain something simple to me about Japan. I look confused but it's only because I have no idea what words he's using.
So yeah, Local hero. Cool grandfather character in my Japanese life.
night school soap opera
So one of my close friends-- someone who extended himself to me right away after I arrived in Japan-- is an English teacher at the affiliated Night-school that caters to academic miscreants.
Early on, he mentioned that if I wanted to, as a purely voluntary act of charity, in my free time and for no pay ...I could teach with him in some of his classes. After listening to his description of the Night School situation, i decided i really wanted to do it. The night school hosts students who
a) can't make it, academically, in regular high schools
or
b) can't attend school during normal hours for one reason or another.
and
c) range in age from 14 to 70.
Some of them, apparently, dont even know the alphabet yet. My presence there would purely be for exposure to a native English speaker. Just to see that I exist and do indeed use English as my primary language. It seemed like a really unique opportunity to get involved in something different.
We decided that I would be introduced to the classes for the first time today. We planned a self-introduction lesson, where the students would ask me questions in English if possible, or Japanese if necessary, and I would answer with the help of the teacher, who would translate as needed.
I would do cool things like give them pennies and solve the rubik's cube too. Going to the night school after work means a 13 hour day (8:30 AM - 9:30 PM), but I was really getting excited about it.
After regular school, at around 5, i was gearing up to go to the classroom and get set up for the first night class. On my way out of the staff room, i mentioned cheerfully to my supervisor:
"Today i'm volunteer teaching at the Night School"
"Oh! if you teach there, you can take a day off!"
"Really? well right now i really have to go... class is starting like now"
*proceeds to go ask my Vice Principal (boss) about getting time off*
Okay, so what followed was my vice principal totally flipping his lid. Apparently this is a big no-no. If i work at the Night School, even purely out of the goodness of my heart, without any desire for compensation, i am REQUIRED to take time off from regular work. This is no problem if the VP knows about it ahead of time and appropriate documents are filed, but he feels that my night school friend was a sneaky little weasel for kind of tricking me into teaching under the table. Now let me make it clear that both of these guys have been extremely kind and supportive of me from day one. I am confident that neither wish to screw me over in any way. They're both intelligent guys.
Well, it turns out they're both stubborn guys too. the Vice Principal proceeds to call the Night School teacher downstairs from his (separate) staff room, and chews him out for like 10 minutes, while my supervisor and I look on awkwardly. My teacher friend (i was repremanded by another ALT for using names in my blog) runs off to start his class, which is now completely unplanned because the whole thing was supposed to involve me introducing myself. So I'm left stammering like "is everything okay? i'm so sorry!" Both guys told me I have no reason to be sorry, and criticized the other.
so awkward. I went up to make sure my Night School friend would be okay for his now completely unplanned class (obviously i was not allowed to teach that time) and he just ragged on the VP for being such a strict beaurocrat. These guys both need to ease up a little.
Anyway, I was kind've pumped for not having to stay at school until 9:30. I stopped in a little coffee house right across the street from my school that i've been meaning to try all along. Only the owner was there, a jovial 55 yearold woman who seemed equal parts surprised and happy to see me. She brewed up a cup of joe for me and we chatted for a good hour and a half. She spoke no English so it felt like a real testament to my progress that I was able to explain things like my family, my sister's adoptiveness, my happiness over the obama election, my approval of her masterful coffee making, etc. She was reaaaaally curious about me and seemed to be hinting the notion of me teaching private english classes there every once in awhile. She showed me a book full of conversational english phrases and casually mentioned that an ALT from a few years ago led a little conversation class there.
The idea sounds good to me. It seems fun and it'd mean some extra dollars. As long as my vice principal doesnt have an aneurysm when i ask him about it, i'll feel that out and see how it goes. It should be legit, a few of my ALT friends teach private study groups like that and rake in a nice supplementary budget. We'll see where that goes.
Tags:
cast of characters,
kokura,
photos,
travel
Weekend Special (way too long)
This last week/weekend was by far the most entertaining one so far, my friends, but unfortunately i havent got a picture to show for it. I will have to try to recapture it in words before i forget any more details.
Preamble - the week
Wednesday I went into Tenjin to meet up with my friend Cira and try to find a Japanese class that a lot of the JETs go to in the city. having missed Cira by going to the wrong trainstation, i decided to get into Tenjin myself and find the place. I had met the main class instructor, Kimiko Suzawa, at the Fukuoka Hanabi (fireworks) festival the week before, so i had her business card with the class hours, name of the building, and presumably, the address. But in Tenjin i discovered that was not the case. Somehow i found the place without the address by asking for directions in a swanky hotel, and managed to get there only ten minutes late. The class was great. I had only JUST finished learning katakana and hiragana that day, and she already had me reading and taking notes in them, and asking strangers what their names are and such. It was a lot of pressure that i wasn't comfortable with, but that's how you freaking get better at a foreign language. Without that kind of experience, i wouldnt feel as pushed to integrate the stuff i'm learning. The class is $10 for a month of weekly lessons and once a month the whole group goes and does something fun. At the end of august we're going to a baseball game. I am pretty psyched about having found it as it's a good excuse to get to Tenjin every week and socialize (and learn Japanese). Suzawa sensei employs a bunch of young Japanese to lead structured conversations for several different brackets of skill levels. It's pretty much exactly what i was looking for. I would be going to my second class tomorrow, but the Asakura highschool brass band is playing a show tomorrow evening (actually a girl with a trombone JUST wandered past me and is currently bowing to the music teacher).
After the concert, my Kyouto sensei (vice principal/underboss guy) is taking me out with his wife to the Kirin Beer Farm. The Kirin factory is located here in Amagi and they apparently have a restaurant too. it should be great. He, like everyone else, seems reeeally curious if/what/how i drink. all invitations in Japan seem to involve an obligatory "and also get drink" by association.
On Friday I went to Futsukaichi again, this time to meet some other new people-- a different crowd of JETs who have been around for a while including Roman. Again, i was supposed to meet Cira at the station. Again, we wound up at the two different stations. This time, though, i was expecting it, so after 10 minutes at the JR station, i took a bus over to the Nishitetsu, where i found her wandering around a sidestreet looking for anyone or the restaurant. We found the place we were meeting, the "Son's House" American/Mexican grill, which was hilarious. I have not been so psyched about all of consuming of fastfood/western food that seems to go down when i hang out with other JETs. I am still really excited about Japanese food, but i can understand why the ALTs who have been here 1, 2 or 3 years crave some greasy imitation American Food, especially when out with other gaijin. I ordered "Plate B" which consisted of 1 huge burger, 1 huge taco, and 10 french fries.
The weekend adventure
On saturday I ventured out to Kokura, a district of Kitakyushu, the other big city in the prefecture outside of Fukuoka, to meet with four others from Orientation that i hadn't seen since we split up at the airport. We all made a pact to visit each other/party in one anothers' inaka (middles of nowhere), rather than only meeting up in the big cities where none of us live.
We first met up at a Mister Donut, yet awkward new friends, in the big train station and, dear reader, by the end of the night the five of us were crashing drunkenly at a local love hotel. In those first few minutes at Mister Donut, my camera battery died, which was seriously upsetting, because so much entertainment went down afterwards.
THE CAST OF CHARACTERS
_____________________________________________________
CHRIS- a friendly bloke from just outside London. Total "indoors kid," as Laura put it after a few drinks. Had a hard time dealing with takeoff when we flew to Fukuoka, but knows how to throw down and karaoke for hours.
MONICA- Aussie girl and fellow photog nerd. together we mourned our lack of cameras, mine for want of battery charge, hers for lack of bag space. and both enjoyed cooking some awesome pork and kimchi okonomiyaki
PATRICK - Tallest of the group, and therefore, our team leader. From Georgia, comes with funny accent, especially when drunk. totally lewd and openly a complete perv. fixated on asian girls. Rocked a Spongebob Squarepants "PATRICK" tshirt and kakhi cargo shorts, proceeding to meet up with his ex, hit on the girl selling phones outside of the Softbank store as well as our 18 year-old waitress at the okonomiyaki restaurant. Speaks Japanese with a special extra-nasaly voice.
LAURA- also refreshingly lewd. totally fetishizes the norse, scandinavian and german types. Not afraid to yell about almost anything. metal and electronic audiophile. four-time renaissance faire attendee. Accidentally wore the same outfit as every woman and female mannequin in Japan (black vest over white shirt). Also, loves loves LOVES to talk about poop.
_____________________________________________________
We left the station and were wandering around the area along the river. When we noticed ¥100 paddleboat rentals and couldnt afford to pass em up. crashing into other crafts proved to be anticlimactic, but several other factors ensured that it was awesome to paddle around the river, anyway.
After we disembarked, we were back on foot again and, after checking out a free "museum" about the river ecology, which consisted largely of mudskippers and a big glass window so you can see into the water, we hit up a cafe-- a sort of Japanese Starbucks spinoff-- where we all got beverages called "Swirkles."
Swirkles? Swirkles! I couldn't stop laughing. So much so that Patrick asked me in all seriousness if i was, in fact, high. I kept trying to use "Swirkle" in a sentence and couldnt even get it out. Just try saying it. Now try to imagine ordering one. it sounds like the sound that would come out if someone was drowning in 2 inches of water. We also read a children's book there about a dog named "Wansuke" (Dogs say "WAN" instead of "Woof" in Japan, i guess) who says things like "KonichiWAN" and, interpretively, "Let's get married, lol."
After the Swirkles, i think we made our to Kokura Castle, a big fortress built in 1602. These days it is just filled with dioramas and ice cream vending machines on the top floor, as well and mannequins with topknots. I think it's really a damn shame that they turned the interior into a museum, but whatever pays the bills, i guess.
After that there was some various idling around. We wandered back towards the train station, i think, though the order of events might be mixed up. At the station we found a giant block of ice... i guess for cooling/washing your hands on, but since everyone touches this melty slab with their sweaty paws, it can't be very sanitary. We met some Australian University deferrers who were staying in Japan too and we all gathered round the ice slab looking like total foreign creeps talking in english and rubbing out hands on the public brick of coldness for like almost an hour.
From there Patrick invited us to accompany him to meet his ex girlfriend who lives around there for the obligatory "So.... youre in town... how's it going?" visit. I couldnt turn down the opportunity for viewing awkwardness so we went with pat as a posse. It turned out to be pretty mild, save a few awkward moments of eye-contact with his Japanese ex. Oh i forgot to mention that he also brought along his supervisor, a younger teacher from his school who is in charge of him, kind of as his date, but by this point she had gone home.
I dont remember if that was before or after Okonomiyaki, but that's what we ate for lunch/dinner. Okonomiyaki is an excellent japanese food which consists of veggies, and meats as you like them, joined together triumphantly in a pool of batter and egg. At some restaurants they cook the whole thing for you, but at the really cool joints like ours, they bring out a bowl of raw ingredients which you mix yourself and fry on a hotplate at your table. Glorious, as you can season and sauce it up as you like. I made a heart. Such yum was had.
After that it was getting to be evening, i believe so we went to a combini and bought cheap beer, since we had discovered that purchasing an "all you can drink" option at the karaoke bar was going to cost like ¥4000 (about $40). From the combini we went to an arcade. My first Japanese arcade. Oh god it was so cool. ridiculous games. sad, sad faces gambling their money away, etc. Laura and I played a few pathetic games of GuitarFreak and DDR before She and Patrick started the downward spiral by drinking and smoking in the arcade itself. Not sure if this was allowed, Monica, Chris and I joined in, but several dirty looks assured us that people were miffed by this behavior, so we moved to the riverbank, where we avoided roaches and got a little slanted together. Serious bonding and talking smack.
From there, we went back to the karaoke joint and got ourselves a room. They brought us wayy too many rounds of beer and we ended up paying almost the "endless booze" price anyway, but still cleared it by a little bit (maybe $10 or so).
Outside there were some Japanese people outside a hiphop club, trying to get us to go inside. Apparently talking some smack to Patrick, who seriously insulted the guy and we hurried away. We grabbed some snacks at a combini (where i found black qtips. so cool) and then we were pretty much ready for bed.
Having vaguely planned to stay all night at an internet cafe with recliners and beds in special "all-night" rooms, it now seemed like a better idea to find a LOVE HOTEL. It didnt take very long. We stopped to ask where we might find one at a Comfort Inn. Classy right? "Excuse me, legitimate establishment, can you tell me where to find your trashy counterpart?" They said there wasn't one around, but then we found one across the street called Hotel Paris or something great like that.
We got the attention of the employee lady in the lobby, who was seriously startled by us. We didnt discover until later that at these businesses, contact with the staff is intended to be minimal. You select a vacant love den from a lightboard in the lobby with photos of each available room illuminated, simply press press the corresponding button, and a key drops out like a vending machine. You then take the key up to the appropriate room and settle the bill via pneumatic tube. Having tipped the staffer off that we clearly had no idea what we were doing, she came up to the room to bother us several times and i hid in the bathroom while Laura and Pat pretended to be a legit couple.
There were no exciting rooms like with rotating beds or built-in bondage gear or "on the subway" themes. Nah, this place wasnt high end, but it came complete with two free condoms in a special holder by the bed and lots of Japanese porn on the tv. The shower pressure, also, was excellent. Pat, Laura and I all hung out on the porch in our underwear before degenerating into a cuddle puddle. Laura and asked me to be a "Chastity barrier" against Pat, but I wasnt about to risk being grazed by some dude-thigh or something worse, so she had to sleep in the middle and get double-arm spooned. Going three to a bed was hard, because as you know, i like to starfish all over a bed. We were serenaded to dizzy sleep by the muffled, pained squeeks of Japanese actresses. Total classiness. this is why i came to Japan.
The next day was the shameful commute home. I was the only one who brought a change of clothes. we had MOS burgers for slunch. MOS is a burger chain (Mountain Ocean Sky) where you can get highschool caf grade patties, sometimes sandwiched between a rice bun. brilliant.
We hit the arcade one last time and made photos in a floor entirely devoted to the activity. We hit a machine called "PARTY GIRL" It was WAY too much fun for something that sounds so lame. omg we got to draw on the pictures! hahaha. seriously though. scarily addictive.
After that we headed back to the train station and sleepily tried to figure out how to get back to our respective homes. We split up and that was that. I only messed up the commute a little bit and got home in about three hours. Go ME!
I like Japan.
This last week/weekend was by far the most entertaining one so far, my friends, but unfortunately i havent got a picture to show for it. I will have to try to recapture it in words before i forget any more details.
Preamble - the week
Wednesday I went into Tenjin to meet up with my friend Cira and try to find a Japanese class that a lot of the JETs go to in the city. having missed Cira by going to the wrong trainstation, i decided to get into Tenjin myself and find the place. I had met the main class instructor, Kimiko Suzawa, at the Fukuoka Hanabi (fireworks) festival the week before, so i had her business card with the class hours, name of the building, and presumably, the address. But in Tenjin i discovered that was not the case. Somehow i found the place without the address by asking for directions in a swanky hotel, and managed to get there only ten minutes late. The class was great. I had only JUST finished learning katakana and hiragana that day, and she already had me reading and taking notes in them, and asking strangers what their names are and such. It was a lot of pressure that i wasn't comfortable with, but that's how you freaking get better at a foreign language. Without that kind of experience, i wouldnt feel as pushed to integrate the stuff i'm learning. The class is $10 for a month of weekly lessons and once a month the whole group goes and does something fun. At the end of august we're going to a baseball game. I am pretty psyched about having found it as it's a good excuse to get to Tenjin every week and socialize (and learn Japanese). Suzawa sensei employs a bunch of young Japanese to lead structured conversations for several different brackets of skill levels. It's pretty much exactly what i was looking for. I would be going to my second class tomorrow, but the Asakura highschool brass band is playing a show tomorrow evening (actually a girl with a trombone JUST wandered past me and is currently bowing to the music teacher).
After the concert, my Kyouto sensei (vice principal/underboss guy) is taking me out with his wife to the Kirin Beer Farm. The Kirin factory is located here in Amagi and they apparently have a restaurant too. it should be great. He, like everyone else, seems reeeally curious if/what/how i drink. all invitations in Japan seem to involve an obligatory "and also get drink" by association.
On Friday I went to Futsukaichi again, this time to meet some other new people-- a different crowd of JETs who have been around for a while including Roman. Again, i was supposed to meet Cira at the station. Again, we wound up at the two different stations. This time, though, i was expecting it, so after 10 minutes at the JR station, i took a bus over to the Nishitetsu, where i found her wandering around a sidestreet looking for anyone or the restaurant. We found the place we were meeting, the "Son's House" American/Mexican grill, which was hilarious. I have not been so psyched about all of consuming of fastfood/western food that seems to go down when i hang out with other JETs. I am still really excited about Japanese food, but i can understand why the ALTs who have been here 1, 2 or 3 years crave some greasy imitation American Food, especially when out with other gaijin. I ordered "Plate B" which consisted of 1 huge burger, 1 huge taco, and 10 french fries.
The weekend adventure
On saturday I ventured out to Kokura, a district of Kitakyushu, the other big city in the prefecture outside of Fukuoka, to meet with four others from Orientation that i hadn't seen since we split up at the airport. We all made a pact to visit each other/party in one anothers' inaka (middles of nowhere), rather than only meeting up in the big cities where none of us live.
We first met up at a Mister Donut, yet awkward new friends, in the big train station and, dear reader, by the end of the night the five of us were crashing drunkenly at a local love hotel. In those first few minutes at Mister Donut, my camera battery died, which was seriously upsetting, because so much entertainment went down afterwards.
THE CAST OF CHARACTERS
_____________________________________________________
CHRIS- a friendly bloke from just outside London. Total "indoors kid," as Laura put it after a few drinks. Had a hard time dealing with takeoff when we flew to Fukuoka, but knows how to throw down and karaoke for hours.
MONICA- Aussie girl and fellow photog nerd. together we mourned our lack of cameras, mine for want of battery charge, hers for lack of bag space. and both enjoyed cooking some awesome pork and kimchi okonomiyaki
PATRICK - Tallest of the group, and therefore, our team leader. From Georgia, comes with funny accent, especially when drunk. totally lewd and openly a complete perv. fixated on asian girls. Rocked a Spongebob Squarepants "PATRICK" tshirt and kakhi cargo shorts, proceeding to meet up with his ex, hit on the girl selling phones outside of the Softbank store as well as our 18 year-old waitress at the okonomiyaki restaurant. Speaks Japanese with a special extra-nasaly voice.
LAURA- also refreshingly lewd. totally fetishizes the norse, scandinavian and german types. Not afraid to yell about almost anything. metal and electronic audiophile. four-time renaissance faire attendee. Accidentally wore the same outfit as every woman and female mannequin in Japan (black vest over white shirt). Also, loves loves LOVES to talk about poop.
_____________________________________________________
We left the station and were wandering around the area along the river. When we noticed ¥100 paddleboat rentals and couldnt afford to pass em up. crashing into other crafts proved to be anticlimactic, but several other factors ensured that it was awesome to paddle around the river, anyway.
After we disembarked, we were back on foot again and, after checking out a free "museum" about the river ecology, which consisted largely of mudskippers and a big glass window so you can see into the water, we hit up a cafe-- a sort of Japanese Starbucks spinoff-- where we all got beverages called "Swirkles."
Swirkles? Swirkles! I couldn't stop laughing. So much so that Patrick asked me in all seriousness if i was, in fact, high. I kept trying to use "Swirkle" in a sentence and couldnt even get it out. Just try saying it. Now try to imagine ordering one. it sounds like the sound that would come out if someone was drowning in 2 inches of water. We also read a children's book there about a dog named "Wansuke" (Dogs say "WAN" instead of "Woof" in Japan, i guess) who says things like "KonichiWAN" and, interpretively, "Let's get married, lol."
After the Swirkles, i think we made our to Kokura Castle, a big fortress built in 1602. These days it is just filled with dioramas and ice cream vending machines on the top floor, as well and mannequins with topknots. I think it's really a damn shame that they turned the interior into a museum, but whatever pays the bills, i guess.
After that there was some various idling around. We wandered back towards the train station, i think, though the order of events might be mixed up. At the station we found a giant block of ice... i guess for cooling/washing your hands on, but since everyone touches this melty slab with their sweaty paws, it can't be very sanitary. We met some Australian University deferrers who were staying in Japan too and we all gathered round the ice slab looking like total foreign creeps talking in english and rubbing out hands on the public brick of coldness for like almost an hour.
From there Patrick invited us to accompany him to meet his ex girlfriend who lives around there for the obligatory "So.... youre in town... how's it going?" visit. I couldnt turn down the opportunity for viewing awkwardness so we went with pat as a posse. It turned out to be pretty mild, save a few awkward moments of eye-contact with his Japanese ex. Oh i forgot to mention that he also brought along his supervisor, a younger teacher from his school who is in charge of him, kind of as his date, but by this point she had gone home.
I dont remember if that was before or after Okonomiyaki, but that's what we ate for lunch/dinner. Okonomiyaki is an excellent japanese food which consists of veggies, and meats as you like them, joined together triumphantly in a pool of batter and egg. At some restaurants they cook the whole thing for you, but at the really cool joints like ours, they bring out a bowl of raw ingredients which you mix yourself and fry on a hotplate at your table. Glorious, as you can season and sauce it up as you like. I made a heart. Such yum was had.
After that it was getting to be evening, i believe so we went to a combini and bought cheap beer, since we had discovered that purchasing an "all you can drink" option at the karaoke bar was going to cost like ¥4000 (about $40). From the combini we went to an arcade. My first Japanese arcade. Oh god it was so cool. ridiculous games. sad, sad faces gambling their money away, etc. Laura and I played a few pathetic games of GuitarFreak and DDR before She and Patrick started the downward spiral by drinking and smoking in the arcade itself. Not sure if this was allowed, Monica, Chris and I joined in, but several dirty looks assured us that people were miffed by this behavior, so we moved to the riverbank, where we avoided roaches and got a little slanted together. Serious bonding and talking smack.
From there, we went back to the karaoke joint and got ourselves a room. They brought us wayy too many rounds of beer and we ended up paying almost the "endless booze" price anyway, but still cleared it by a little bit (maybe $10 or so).
Outside there were some Japanese people outside a hiphop club, trying to get us to go inside. Apparently talking some smack to Patrick, who seriously insulted the guy and we hurried away. We grabbed some snacks at a combini (where i found black qtips. so cool) and then we were pretty much ready for bed.
Having vaguely planned to stay all night at an internet cafe with recliners and beds in special "all-night" rooms, it now seemed like a better idea to find a LOVE HOTEL. It didnt take very long. We stopped to ask where we might find one at a Comfort Inn. Classy right? "Excuse me, legitimate establishment, can you tell me where to find your trashy counterpart?" They said there wasn't one around, but then we found one across the street called Hotel Paris or something great like that.
We got the attention of the employee lady in the lobby, who was seriously startled by us. We didnt discover until later that at these businesses, contact with the staff is intended to be minimal. You select a vacant love den from a lightboard in the lobby with photos of each available room illuminated, simply press press the corresponding button, and a key drops out like a vending machine. You then take the key up to the appropriate room and settle the bill via pneumatic tube. Having tipped the staffer off that we clearly had no idea what we were doing, she came up to the room to bother us several times and i hid in the bathroom while Laura and Pat pretended to be a legit couple.
There were no exciting rooms like with rotating beds or built-in bondage gear or "on the subway" themes. Nah, this place wasnt high end, but it came complete with two free condoms in a special holder by the bed and lots of Japanese porn on the tv. The shower pressure, also, was excellent. Pat, Laura and I all hung out on the porch in our underwear before degenerating into a cuddle puddle. Laura and asked me to be a "Chastity barrier" against Pat, but I wasnt about to risk being grazed by some dude-thigh or something worse, so she had to sleep in the middle and get double-arm spooned. Going three to a bed was hard, because as you know, i like to starfish all over a bed. We were serenaded to dizzy sleep by the muffled, pained squeeks of Japanese actresses. Total classiness. this is why i came to Japan.
The next day was the shameful commute home. I was the only one who brought a change of clothes. we had MOS burgers for slunch. MOS is a burger chain (Mountain Ocean Sky) where you can get highschool caf grade patties, sometimes sandwiched between a rice bun. brilliant.
We hit the arcade one last time and made photos in a floor entirely devoted to the activity. We hit a machine called "PARTY GIRL" It was WAY too much fun for something that sounds so lame. omg we got to draw on the pictures! hahaha. seriously though. scarily addictive.
After that we headed back to the train station and sleepily tried to figure out how to get back to our respective homes. We split up and that was that. I only messed up the commute a little bit and got home in about three hours. Go ME!
I like Japan.
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