Judgement day

Tomorrow is a big day for Japan.
The elections for the Diet, Japan's legislative body, will be held around the country, and the Japanese Democratic Party (DPJ) is poised to win by a landslide. This will spell defeat for the Liberal Democratic Party (LDP) which has ruled almost uninterrupted for 54 odd years, i.e. since the end of WWII.


As an American who blindly embraces all change as inherently good (lol), it is exciting to see the whole country electrified with anticipation of reform. Perhaps Japan is partly fired-up by the recent Obama frenzy of the US election, which was heavily covered and glorified by the Japanese media. During the campaign, this kind of programming was on TV almost 24/7 and children I didn't even know yelled "YES WE CAN" at me from their passing bicycles. Drive-by English.

But it would not be fair to give credit for the current fanfare to America. It is genuinely exciting to see so many Japanese people in my own community and all across the country coming together in droves to give a damn about their own political grievances. With little control over the political process, and therefore lacking a sense of responsibility, my Japanese counterparts have been shockingly ambivalent up until now towards all things political. On the other hand, perhaps this is simply a derivative of Japanese reservedness, for even now, amidst the great energy in the air, people are still reluctant to share which party they support.

Indeed, my girlfriend, whose parents are both local politicians, joined the DPJ effort by volunteering to canvass; talking to her friends and neighbors door-to-door and and asking for support for our local DPJ representative amidst local malls. Determined to make a difference in our fairly rural, conservative community, she donned a mic in one of the infamously boisterous announcement-vans: huge RVs which drive around in the evening dispensing political messages from giant loudspeakers which can be heard for miles.

This kind of campaigning may seem dated old-fashioned because direct internet campaigning and news coverage of campaign events has been barred in an effort to control media bias. This gives the whole election a wholesome grass-roots consistency.
___________________
The stars seem to be aligned
...for the DPJ to overtake the long-obsolete LDP. Things are slow to change in Japan and this has been long in coming; the LDP has shuffled in and out three prime ministers since 2007--which would be like having the Republicans switch the president without an election every year for 3 years. And now it has all come to a head: people are fed up with corrupt autocrats and mismanaged resources, and the resulting economic stagnation. The last thing Japan needs is another Lost Generation.

Indeed, the DPJs message "change," hoping to replicate Obama's success. The system certainly needs an overhaul; the DPJ has pledged to phase out corrupt local officials and crack down on backroom dealing, promoting an unheard-of brand of transparent politics.
___________________
But all is not perfect in the world of Japanese politics.
While they are slated for an historic victory, the DPJ hardly appears prepared to take the reigns of the world's second-largest economy. A series of bribery scandals does not further their case against corruption, and the current head of the DPJ, Yukio Hatoyama, who will likely become the new Prime Ministerm, has managed to bungle issues as sensative as the role of the passive Japanese Self-Defense force. He has also been looking a little less than professional lately:


...Then again, who doesn't have a bad hair day every once in a while?

Another problem is The DPJ has recently been targeting capitalist free-markets as a source of economic downturn, and plans to promote more over-regulation in a market already strangled by government policy. At the same time, they have already agreed to protect many markets from Free Trade. What Japanese businesses need is more freedom to fire and hire, to grow and to die if need be. Ever increasing are zombie companies barred from firing employees and staying afloat only through aide from the federal government. Sound familiar? This will do little to reverse the tides of a culture that was once reknowned for it's innovative businesses, now more famous for it's droning, drunken bureaucrats . Unfortunately this may continue to be the shape of things to come. Nevertheless, the normally passive and indifferent general population seems desperately hungry for reform, and that is as promising a sign as any.

___________________
Judgement Day
And so today marks the closing of the campaign season, and the openning of the ballots, news coverage has reached peak melodrama, and has resorted to sweet CG graphics:



Yes, they actually used the theme from Terminator 2: Judgement Day
___________________
Prediction:
I'm calling it... somewhere in tomorrow's headlines: CHANGE HAS COME TO JAPAN!

一年の日本

Happy anniversary! Today marks it; a full year since I became a registered foreign resident of Japan: this island nation which brings us 2-dimensional lovers and life-sized gundams.

Ironically, I spent the day not in Japan, but making a connection in Taipei after a 9 day holiday to Thailand. How fitting that the week leading up to my one-year centennial with Japan was spent enjoying a well-deserved first-trip outside the country.

Here are some things I've learned during my one year in Japan.

The strap that dangles from your cell phone is more important than the phone itself.

It's better to be cute than hot.

Leave things the way you found them.

Take off your shoes.

The best place to nap is on a train.

"On time" is late.

Home insulation was a very, very good idea.

Sometimes just showing someone that you thought of them is more important than how you express it.

All-you-can-drink menus are so overrated. All-you-can eat menus are not.

In the pursuit of a harmonious, conflict-less society, Japan has accidentally become one of the most socialist cultures in the world.

Emoticons are extremely important.

Tie clips are awesome.

A human being can get used to just about anything.

small realization

Knowing only English in Japan is like being able to read exclusively filler text in foreign languages that they throw on "exotic" products in America.

You can read all of what you're not supposed to understand and none of what matters.

NB: Often yields hilarity.

"ne" sensei

copied from my IRL notepad journal:

This week, the weather has changed again. After a shaky start of intermittent and misleading warm days, it seems that spring has finally come to stay. Yesterday I was commuting to my weekly Japanese class downtown, and I was actually uncomfortably hot on the train, which was a nice change of pace. It means that the weather will be beautiful for about 2 weeks followed by hordes of giant mutant insects and what one of my friends likes to call "the death heat."

It's an emotional time of flux at work as well; yesterday marked the last day of classes and teacher transfers were announced, which is to say the Board of Education released the information about which teachers will transfer to a new school in the Spring and which will stay put. This process occurs entirely without input from the teachers concerned and they are informed of the decision with about 2 week's notice.

One by one throughout the afternoon, the principal called the teachers in question to his office for individual meetings. I was speaking with my supervisor at the end of the day when the vice principal excused himself for interrupting, and beckoned her to follow him into the hallway. She came back five minutes later--visibly shaken--and told me she will be transferring to a school near the city. That means in two weeks we will receive a new English teacher and I'll be assigned a different supervisor (most likely a teacher who is already here). My feelings on that topic are mixed and multifaceted, and a touch too delicate for the public domain, so if you're interested in the specifics, may I suggest that you contact me by email?

Today, after an Oo-soji (extended cleaning period) in which the floors were waxed, we have filed into the gymnasium, where the school closing ceremony is being delivered as I scribble this on sheets of B5 paper on a blue clipboard. Closing ceremonies consists of speeches, the singing of the school song, and the bestowment of award certificates. Are you noticing a pattern yet? There is one teacher who always gives speeches during these events and every other word out of his mouth is "ne" or "desune," which is sort of akin to the overuse of "like" during English speeches. I started noticing it a while back and now I just laugh every time he starts going. He doesn't say it when he speaks normally or to small groups. Only when addressing the whole school. desune?

One homeroom group of boys consipred to be really cool by wearing their summer uniforms instead of the winter ones that everyone else is still wearing. The students have their free choice as to which uniform to wear--between the short-sleeved light cotton summer uniforms or the woolen dark blue and black winter fare. One group of boys tends to deviate as a posse and show off by wearing the out-of-season uniform for formal events. It's a Japanese thing about the association between being cold and toughness.

I am so excited for next year and all of the changes! From this week, I will be reorganizing my desk and outlining a curriculum for the year. If that sounds boring to you, keep in mind that I joined this school mid-year. inheriting a job, desk and materials from various predecessors, and largely had to plan my class week by week on the fly because of being thrown into a poorly organized deep-end. The notion of having the chance to take ownership of my classes for the first time, organize my own accumulating teaching materials, and implement my own teaching policies is very, very exciting.

observation

In most beverage commercials, and almost ALL beer commercials on Japanese tv, there is at least one key scene in which there is a close-up of an actor drinking the beverage with an exagerated, all-too -personal gulping sound. it creeps me out every time.

example:

white rice fever

white rice is such a staple here that it is served with every meal almost without exception. Even if bread is offered, rice is customarily provided as well. Observe here as you can see rice and bread compete for attention on the same plate.

horrifying realization

the head teacher for first-year students laughs exactly like Newman from Seinfeld

へえええええ！

How do you express surprise? Have you ever really thought about it? all those "surprised" sounds we make?

I definitely didn't. And I certainly never considered the sounds I make in shock to be a part of the English language canon. But travelling from America to Japan certainly brings this assumption under scrutiny. Where we English speakers might place interjections like WHOA!, WOW! and NO WAI!, Japanese tend to gravitate towards a drawn out, rising Ehhhhhhhhhhhh! or Hu-ehhhhhh!

The only thing i can compare it to is every 5th graders' instinctive reaction upon hearing a peer's name called over the PA, being summoned to the principal's office. It's exactly that kind of rising pitch, but with a different phoneme.

A quick flip through Japanese news and game show media highlights this phonetic phenomenon. It's one of those things that seemed like probably just a Japanese stereotype, but it turns out to be so entrenched and abusively used as to be almost a satire of itself. Even on news programming, audience members are a must when dolling out new or surprising information because it just doesn't seem so novel without that instant appropriate social reaction. It's like a socially ingrained call-and-response.

As we speak... as i type?... two male teachers are having a conversation across the room. Although the dramatic drawn out Heeee-EEEEH is more girly, men use the interjection too, making it a bit shorter and lower, with a more consistent (opposed to rising) inflection.

It's one of the few things i couldnt help myself from doing while i was in America last week. It's just so important to listening to people when you're trying to speak Japanese.

So yesterday afternoon, i took my lunch home to eat and i had the tv on, perusing my usual buffet of game shows. I stumbled across one where they actually built a game around the interjection:

First they brought out three contestents, each decked out in traditional Japanese garb, ornate kimonos, which elicited a fair amount of "ehhh"s from the audience in and of itself.

Then the host explained...

(haha sorry, more people are doing it right next to me now.)

So the host explained that the contestants would have to make the audience say EHH! as much as possible. He brought out this tiny theatrical stage-and-curtain apparatus, roughly puppet theater size, with a draw-string on the side to pull the curtain up and down. One by one, the contestants would stand behind the curtain, and then a tiny cartoon voice would count down 3--2--1--- and then the host pulls up the curtain and the contestant has to make a true statement about him or herself that will knock the socks off the audience. Something unexpected. Then audience then reacts to its heart's content, and then an LED scoreboard indicates a numerical value corresponding to the amount of "EHH!" that was elicited. After the studio audience finishes shrieking, the host says the Japanese equivalent of "For reals??" and conducts a micro interview with the person, still inside the tiny stage, about their outrageous and true experience.

I will never tire of Japanese television.

Ohh, i just heard a good one

お疲れさまです

Okay class, settle down. Today we're studying everyday Japanese.

Perhaps one of the first phrases you would learn as a business traveller to Japan would be お疲れ様です, or "Otsukare sama desu"

It's often translated as "good work", "thanks for the hard work," or sometimes even "you must be tired" but it's meaning and common usage are much deeper--and more hilarious--than that.

I probably say お疲れさまです or it's past-tense counterpart 10-20 times every workday. We say it to each other after a class, after a meeting, or after almost anything work related that might have required an ounce or two of energy. (i.e. anything above and beyond sleeping at ones desk).

To get the literal meaning, let's break it down.

The last word, "desu" is just the verb "to be." It means that whatever comes before it "is."

The first word is "tsukare," meaning "to be tired" but it's distinct from other kinds of tiredness and exhaustion. Tsukare means specifically being tired from working too hard. It's a cultural gem in and of itself

Adding "O-" to the front of "tsukare" (Otsukare) makes it "honorific." In Japanese you add the Honorific "O" to many things, especially Japanese type things like green tea and bentos. But this is only done if the object in question pertains to someone else. For example, when offering someone tea, it is polite to say O-cha. (O-tea... "your tea, sire"), but if referring to your own tea, you should drop the O to be more modest. (MY stuff is normal. YOUR stuff is extra special). Mmm even more cultural goodness packed into that tiny prefix.

The next word in the phrase is "sama."
Sama is one of many japanese words that are equated roughly to "Mister" in English. However, the normal version is San, meaning Mr/Mrs/Ms. Seidman-san, Bethany-san, Kitajima-san, etc. (as an aside, it works for first names as well as last, as distinct from English).

Japanese has many more versions of these, each with a different meanings depending on your relationship to the person. Like in English, sometimes a person's title can replace Mr. For example, just like Mr. Gregory House, MD can be called Dr. House, Mr. Notohara, the teacher, can and should be called "Notohara sensei" Here are the variations that i know of:

-san: standard Mr./Ms.

-sensei: teacher (which leads to a lot awkward translations into Michael-teacher or Takakura-teacher when students try to translate into English)

-chan: for girls, young women, and cutesy/diminuative nicknames (both genders) sometimes dudes have told me their nickname is A-chan or somesuch.

-kun: for boys and young men, or a guy you're really friendly with. One of the ALTs at my school used to be called "Ben-kun" by his students, which means that they really viewed him as a peer.

finally...
-sama: reserved for superiors and seniors.


So the whole thing -- Otsukare sama desu-- means literally

"You are Mr. Honorably-tired-from-working-too-hard."

Hahahahaha

This i culled this snippet by rin from the forums at ithinkimlost. I think it succinctly addresses what i've been struggling to put my finger on, regarding Japanese English education.

It would be best to accept that English education here is not intended as an actual foreign language cirriculum[sic], but as a sorting method, and highlighter. As a sorting method, English is ideally suited because it is a highly complex system with a lot of idiosyncracies. By placing it on entrance exams, you can generally sort the good students from the bad by their English skill (the general thinking being that if you can master the complexities of English, then you can master anything else - the SAT and ACT is guilty of this same thing, only they test you on how many ten-dollar words you know). As a highlighter, English serves as a backdrop from which Japanese and Japaneseness are contrasted, thereby helping to instill nationalism in the students. Similar results are achieved through "Internationalization".

English education here would be radically different if they actually intended for these kids to learn the language, as opposed to mastering a complex system.

They could save a lot of money by inventing a complex cypher and having the kids learn that, instead of paying ALTs to come to Japan and suffer through watching their language gang-raped repeatedly day after day.

Wisdom.

a trip to the zoo

Coming to you live and direct from my desk at Asakura Agricultural High School. I am teaching here for the first time today, doing a new and improved version of the "self-introduction" act that I performed at my base school. I was warned that the students were rowdy, disobedient, and bad, and i gotta say, it's all true and i love it.

In Japan, students go through a universal public school system up until Junior high. Education in Junior high school means, much like in America, you see a cross-section of students at all levels. Future businessmen, farmers, politicians and truck drivers all share the classroom. Then they graduate from junior high and take high school entrance exams. Thus their lives of assessment and rank-ordering will begin.

There are a few different tiers of high schools in Japan. My every-day school, Asakura High School, is an upper-level academic variety. It's somewhat analogous to American prep schools; over 90% of the graduates will go on to universities, so that means that the students are very hard workers, but the curriculum is focused on testing and memorization, which ain't exactly how most ALT's wish to conduct their conversationally based classes. My students are brilliant and kind, but also frustratingly shy and unwilling to generate content or participate in english dialog even when they know how. they are conditioned to fear failure. Failure means not passing the test. Not passing the test means not getting into that prep school or college. not getting into that college means no bright future. So when the ALT comes to visit and asks them to "Practice these phrases with your partner!" the reaction isn't exactly warm and exuberant. The one part of my class that does factor into their grades are the textbook activities and the vocabulary there-of that they have to memorize. My least favorite part of the class. The kids who really participate and seem to be much smarter as a result are actually the special ed students. because they arent afraid to TRY.

THIS school on the other hand-- Asakura Agricultural School, is a little different. This is an occupational school. Not many of the kids are gonna go to college, and those who do aren't aiming for the most competetive ones. So that means that, yes they are not gonna work so hard, especially in English class, but there is an overall higher proportion of those wanting to give it a shot. They try to sound things out! My god, They ask questions! I'm in heaven. TIme to go teach class number 3

______
Update: 9PM
Okay the third class was a doozy. It was the largest and rowdiest of the bunch, and the students were chotto....

Yeah they were loud and yelling the whole time. texting on their phones and whatnot. It was exhausting. But still there were glimmers where a few students had that promising look of simultaneous interest and understanding on their faces, and that is so redeeming. And as I mentioned above. these students are not afraid to ask questions or come right and and say what they're thinking. I really enjoyed the change of pace today.

Oh yeah and this one kid who had no uniform (which is like a BIG nono)... actually he was wearing a CANIBIS jumpter... He kept running into the room SCREAMING and sliding around the floor on his knees. The teacher kept shooing him out and he came back like at least three times. It was hilarious. I couldnt stop laughing. And apparently some of the students that were supposed to be in my class, straight up went to a math class instead. Others were half undressed. Or half wearing gym clothes. It was ridiculous and i totally loved it.

I recovered by watching medical dramas all night. I should explain. This week and last week in my regular classes, we have been learning English of "Going to the Doctor." Last week i explained to them about my job working in a pediatrics clinic, and this week i figured it would be a good follow up to play a game where they have to use english phrases (i.e. what's wrong? i have a sore throat) in a format i have dubbed HUMAN BINGO. (I can explain if you're curious about how to play human bingo).

Anyway that will be for the first half of my 50 minute class, and during the second half i wanted to show them House MD or Scrubs.

But i quickly realized that showing them a whole episode of a show is pretty usepess without the Japanese subtitles, and soon found that i couldnt download a subtitled version of either show anywhere. So I had to settle for what was available in Best Denki's foreign DVD section: ER or Grey's Anatomy. (Best Denki is just like Best Buy).

So i previewed all the episodes tonight and found the *almost* perfect episode of Grey's Anatomy to show. It uses a lot of the words and phrases we used last week, and there is even a bit about a patient who can't speak english, and the miscommunication is touching and inspirational, etc. Seriously i almost cried because i live in Japan and I know how it can be SO hard to communicate when something is really important.

Anyway, so i have to show them this episode, but there's one problem: a part of the episode's story arc revolves around a SEVERED PENIS. When it came up at the beginning i figured i could just skip past it and save a few minutes, but they keep coming back to it OVER and OVER again throughout the episode. So ive decided to just be honest and direct because i really think the good outweighs the inappropriateness. I'll let my JTE's know what's up and give it my best! my students are too shy to laugh uproriously anyway. ha.

So yeah i just spent the rest of the night watching videos like this: http://jp.youtube.com/watch?v=QIr2oEpyCoQ&feature=related

Oh yeah, additionally i took the Japanese Language Proficiency Test (JLPT) for the first time yesterday. I attempted yon-kyuu (level 4) which is the lowest of the 4 levels, working their way towards 1.

It was a really good experience and I am more motivated than ever to study Japanese. My conversation is pretty acceptable, and it has gotten to the point where I am often superficially complemented on my "masterful Japanese" (this is a common complaint of any foreigner in Japan who has taken a college class, and only means that they notice you have SOME ability to talk)

but i basically have learned everything i know by conversation with Japanese friends. So while I am getting pretty skilled at communicating my general ideas in broken Japanese/easy English, I rarely crack an actual resource such as a textbook, and have therefore made little progress in the way of really learning the rules, verb conjugations, and so on. Now, having taken (and probably failed) the test now, i am more inspired to get serious about learning the textbook stuff. I have one Japanese friend who is a qualified tutor who may start meeting every week me for private lessons. Also, I am thinking that if i did indeed fail the JLPT, i may drop out of my Wednesday class downtown and search for a more academic, possibly closer one.

The advantages of the Wednesday class, such as having an excuse to go downtown and meet with other ALTs) have been gradually outweighed by a now constant flow of invitations and plans with friendsas well as the expenses in time and money of going downtown and coming home at 11 in the middle of the week. Now it's getting colder and colder, So spending 18 bucks to go downtown for two hours, only to come home and not have enough time to get sufficient rest, is getting less and less fun. Speaking of winter, i may be high on kerosene fumes from my heater right now.

Anyway, one funny thing about the JLPT was that you can see Japanese society in the test questions. Unfortunately i couldnt photograph it because it is an extremely official beaurocratic test issued perhaps by a part of the government (everyone in the country starts the test at exactly the same time, etc. it's very official and you can put it on your resume). So for example, the males in the test are always doing something like studying or going someplace important, while the females in the examples and diagrams are always gardenning, washing dishes, making bread, or occasionally going somewhere important attached to a man. Very interesting.

Well there goes another night in Amagi. Time for a hot bath and a nice pre-warmed bed (thank you electric blanket)!

Japanese people are SO RUDE!

Okay, almost nobody in the world would ever say that about this culture, myself included, but here are some interesting cultural notes:

The general preconception of Japan is that it is the quintessential "high context" culture. the anthropologically-sensitive traveller or ex-pat in Japan can expect to guard vigilantly against many seemingly natural behaviors to him that are considered offensive or otherwise questionable in his new host culture. He might even invest in a book or two on the topic of Japanese ettiquette so he is sure he'll do a good job and fit in.

Examples of special politeness precautions to take in Japan are splattered all over the internet and popular media, and in prefaces to travel guides everywhere: DON'T cross your chopsticks or leave them sticking up out of a bowl of rice. DON'T point with one finger. DON'T talk loudly or on your cell phone on the train. DON'T ask for a doggy bag. DON'T eat while walking in public or on the train. DO bow. DO take business cards with both hands, etc. etc. etc.

The list goes on and on, though foreigners are generally granted a cultural pass-card for many of these faux pas. Indeed, many Japanese people seem as surprised and taken aback as they are impressed when I do one of these things the right way, or at least show some humility for doing it the wrong way.

However, there are a few things i've noticed that are rude in America but common in Japan. I thought these "rude" Japanese habits might interest you, dear reader.

1. Asking someone's age: I am invariably asked how old I am at some point within my first couple conversations with someone new. For a young guy like me, this is not such a big deal and it's certainly not embarrassing. People are usually a little surprised that I'm so young, but that's not so bad. What's striking is how obsessed everyone seems with the question of age. Furthermore, they are seemingly impressed/surprised by the simple fact that I HAVE an age. They usually react as if it's some kind of accomplishment:

ex.
"i'm 22"
"eeeeeeeeeeeeh!!!!! sugooooi!!" (Woooow! great!)
"he's 22 years old! did you HEAR that??"
"he's 22!?? wow!"

on a related note...
2. Asking if someone has a boy/girlfriend: This one weirds me out a little more. New acquaintences, especially females my age, like to ask if I have a girlfriend as one of their first few questions (and of course by students). Now of course, it's entirely possibly that I am just THAT completely studly that everyone wants to know if I'm available. Maybe asking this kind of question right away is as much of a come-on as it would be in the US, but my ego-regulator tells me that it's probably just another demographical question that Japanese people like to ask when meeting someone new, like "where are you from?" "What sports do you play?" "How old are you?" and "Can you use chopsticks?"

3. Private life, lack of: This may not be true in the big cities of Japan, but i live in a small town where my existence as "the one white guy" is an area of public interest. A few weeks ago, one of my friends, Laura (another ALT, happily attached to a boyfriend) came to visit Amagi and hang out with me. We ended up going to Jusco for grocery shopping (Jusco is an awesome business- exactly like Target PLUS a big supermarket). Anyway, Jusco is one of the only things to do in Amagi after 7:00PM, so a lot of students like to hang out there for fun. It's akin to going to the mall, in a way. While there, we inevitably bumped into a few of my students. The next day at school i was asked no less than 5 times by different students about my trip to Jusco with my girlfriend. Communicating that it's not exactly like that is very difficult. Out here in the countryside, men and women rarely hang out alone together as "just friends."

In fact, I often hear about my own adventures the next day. "I heard you went downtown yesterday" "I heard you went grocery shopping!" "I heard you want to buy a car." It all goes back to courtesy. Foreigners often speak glowingly about how making the slightest mention of a problem or desire in passing to colleagues or higher-ups almost always results in a resolution or solution quickly, without any action really required of them. That same obsessive curiosity about what your contemporaries are really thinking is what makes this possible

4. Slurping food: Well... not all food, but any soup with noodles: ramen, udon, soba should be slurped. The louder the better. Slurping means you are enjoying the meal so, in fact, it's almost considered rude to NOT slurp, thus implying that the food is not great. A lot of Americans have a hard time breaking a lifetime of social conditioning against slurping, but i love to. I always try to out-slurp the old Japanese people sitting near me in restaurants. When they hear me slurping, they usually start slurping louder, as if to assert their superior Japaneseness over me. "NO foreigner is going to enjoy soba more than ME!!1!"

On the other hand, non-noodle soups, like miso, should not be slurped, nor should beverages. Especially tea.

5. Talking with your mouth full: Again, not sure if this is considered completely acceptable or maybe just less rude than we're accustomed to, but i see a lot of Japanese, especially my supervisor carrying on conversation with a mouth full of muffin of noodles or whatever. It drives me CRAZY. Especially because I can barely understand her English as-is, unobstructed. With the addition of a mouth full of food, all hope for comprehension is lost.

6. Grabby hands: No, i'm not referring to kancho nor the fabled Japanese students' curiosity about foreigners genitals... but this happens often enough to get on my nerves. Some people will straight up grab things out of my hands or off of my desk without asking nicely let alone explaining why. I can understand that it might too difficult with communication barriers to explain why she wants to see my passport so she can fill out a section of the form at the bank for me, but I am rarely offered even a "please" and never have a chance to give her permission before she grabs a paper from my desk, or a pen out of my hand, or even my bank book. It's just "give me..." or "can I have...." and then *GRAB.* I'm sure nobody realizes it but that's really offensive by my standards.

7. Eye contact: Japan is not an eye-contact society. Even having an intimate conversation with a well-known friend does not necessitate eye-to-eye gaze. That's fine for me, because as many of you know, eye-contact is not my forte, but still, even though it doesnt bother me that people don't look at me, i do notice.

8. Sneeze acknowledgement, lack of: Most cultures have a post-sneeze follow-up word or phrase like "Bless you." or "Gazunteit," but in Japan sneezes go unacknowledged. This bothered me at first, but i quickly got used to it. Now i'm worried about getting used to not blessing people for when i come back home.

9. Public Drunkenness: Totally socially acceptable to be completely and obviously inebriated in public, on the street, on the bus, anywhere. It's a common sight to see office men still in their suits, stumbling around the Hakata ramen stalls at 10 or 11:00 downtown, barely able to walk, being loud, belligerent, basically defying all the Japanese politeness rules because theyre so eff'd up and drunk. Like being a foreigner, drinking, i guess, gives you a cultural pass-card to act/be expected to act rude and obnoxious. Not so much in the US, where it may be expected, but certainly isnt approved of by the mainstream.

10. Shaving/brushing your teeth/clipping your nails/getting dressed AT WORK: The ideal Japanese worker basically lives at work, so it's generally accepted (and probably smiled upon) for employees to do things generally restricted to the privacy of home in the office, if it means working longer hours. Mind you it doesnt matter if you're actually doing a good job or even working, but if youre AT work, youre a good Japanese worker. clip away! This morning, one gym teacher was even watching anime loudly off of his laptop at work, which struck me as rude and disruptive for any office in the world.

Anyway, that's a good start. And I'm sure there are plenty more where that came from.

greater than the sum of its parts

I remember sitting on the couch with Rosie and Brett back in Worcester, watching Blue Planet, a series produced by the BBC devoted to the amazing life to be found in the Ocean. In the Pacific, they featured are huge schools of small fish. When a whale comes up from the abyss to feed, the hundreds of fish school together into a giant whirling ball of whale-food. The whales feed in passes. rushing through the swarm over and over again until theyve had their fill, and retreat. while apart none of the fish can outrun the whale, most of the school will survive by sheer volume, the group manages to carry on without splitting up.

Meanwhile it is cicada season in Japan. The cicadas (semi) are everywhere and they spend most of their time screaming for sex at the top of their lungs (thoraxes?).. It's kind of mating call that i imagine is similar to what it might be like to stand next to a landing fleet of UFOs. 

Semi spend the majority of their life (often more than ten years) in a larval state below the ground. During maturation, they crawl out of the ground and transform into giant noisy creatures with wings but no mouths, and apparently no sense of direction, as they fly into everything. Their sole purpose, since it obviously isn't eating, is to reproduce. and they do so in humongous generations called broods. 

I should also mention that semi are delicious to most larger animals, some humans included. Therefore, the life-cycle of a cicada is always a prime number of years because it keeps the predators from adapting to a natural flowing rhythm of delicious adult semi wafting through the air. But the main defense mechanism of semi is, again, sheer volume. By reproducing in such huge broods, they ensure that predators can have their fill (it's inevitable really) and there will STILL be enough reproducing individual to keep the population steady.

Bearing in mind these two examples, let us re-evaluate the schooling patterns of another species-- a subpopulation, like the fish, native to the South Pacific.

[photos to come]

While watching practice in the gym today, i commented to my supervisor how interesting the emphasis on group dynamics is to me. I mentioned how seeing everyone move together is so entrancing, and reminds me of the schooling fish.

"To us, this is the concept of absolute beauty."

"You mean complete group coordination?"

"Yes. In Japan, if you lose your individual identity... it's okay."  

gestalt culture

It's interesting what is and isn't acceptable at work and in public in Japan. For example, it would be considered extremely rude for me to cross my legs ankle-to knee right now, or put on my sunglasses even here in the harsh sun. Meanwhile, a nearby teacher wears a huge green translucent visor the he's angled down across his face, creating a sort of welding-mask effect. beside me, two teachers exchange what sounds like useful gossip, and the teacher to my right sleeps in his folding chair.

In fact, it's acceptable to sleep almost anywhere under any circumstances, which tells me that sleep is neglected here on a national scale. It's especially common to sleep on the bus or train. it's quite usual to see businessmen, heads down and eyes closed, supposedly sleeping even as they stand on their 5-minute commute, clinging to the hand grips dangling from above.

The students are all dressed in white tshirts and color-coordinated gym shorts corresponding to their class year. I sit with the other teachers in my "sports clothes" --a tech shirt and gym shorts-- under the shade of a tent pitched by the students. Some of the teachers are decked out in white baseball caps, track suits and many of the women wear light jackets and wide-brimmed hats to shield themselves from the sun beating down, attempting to keep their skin pale (more feminine).

We sit in folding chairs under shaded oasis in the middle of the sports field as a brass band military march is piped over the field through tinny loudspeakers. The students march in place in eight blocks organized by gender and class rank, legs all rising and falling in unison. Blocks of dark legs and light legs. Blocks of boys and girls.

watching the students practice for Sports Day, coming up this weekend, i suddenly feel that i am sitting on a scene at a training camp during World War II in Japan. The students begin to march around the field in synchrony and practice raising their arms, straight out at a 45 degree angle as they pass the teachers' tent, evoking an eerily nazi military aesthetic that disagrees with their gym shorts and smiling faces. along with the tinny march music blaring on loop over the speakers, it feels like i've been dropped into a black and white newsreel.

However, although these marching drills are perhaps military-inspired, they have little to do with aggression or violence and everything to do with group-mindedness, arguably the fundamental component informing Japanese social culture. The students leard to fall into order, becoming simple moving parts of a bigger, complex whole. 1000 pairs of legs rising and falling together. Blocks of dark legs and light legs. Blocks of colored shorts.

My vice principal, (my boss) is new to our staff this year, and so it is his first Sports Day at Asakura High School as well. He turns to me from his folding chair just to my right and says as an aside,

"Beautiful, isnt it?"

I have to agree. Like the many bubbly arms of some sea anemone waving together in the same ocean current, the students all moving together perfectly becomes something larger than itself. Something that hints at group consciousness. Japan, a nation with few natural resources, a small string of islands in the Pacific, surrounded by larger countrie, has developed for itself a toolbox of cultural developments that allow it to become greater than the sum of its parts. Attitudes that menetrate every aspect of the culture. Perhaps the school system in particular.

The students are marching past us again, arms outstretched, folding then neatly, row by row, as they pass the teachers' sanctuary of shade. Another group of students acting as color-guard traverse the field, carrying a twelve foot Japanese flag in two rows of four. a lone student leads the group bearing the school flag: a green field embroidered with gold, containing the school logo and name, written in kanji, in the middle.

The flag-bearers stop midfield and march in place as the hundreds of other students march, blocked, around the field, lining up to join them marching in place.

A teacher in a bright white baseball cap and white polo shirt, collar popped, yells commands on the loudspeaker over the music, which is now starting again on loop for the 5th or 6th time. The students now wait as the music stops and they receive what i can only imagine to be a pretty harsh critique from the drill teacher.

Now they run back to the end of the field and form, again, their perfect straight rows by raising their arms straight out in front of them, and measuring aligning themselves with those in front.

The music begins again and they start to run the drill once more. They will be practicing all week.